The Astrology Report from Scary Carrie

HELLO, FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS! IT’S TIME FOR YOUR WEEKLY ASTROLOGY REPORT, SPONSORED IN PART BY HARPER SUNKWORKS! Dust off your hangover and listen up, you salty bastards! Venus is now partying it up in Sagittarius but having a little spat with Neptune who is staggering home on the walk of shame to Pices on 10/25….

Weekly Horoscope from the Disgruntled Psychic – Carrie L. Pierce

I know I said I’d do this after lunch and its 2138 so it’s technically after lunch …. hey… My time is money you know. I ain’t running a goddamn charity here, so pay the fuck attention: Here are your goddamn horoscopes ARIES: The first week may be packed with details and fine points you’ve…